‘He must figure a woman in high heels from New York City would not be hiding a jumbo pack of gum in the waistband of her neatly pressed Banana Republic slacks. When his metal-detecting wand shrieks where the pack of gum is hidden, he dismisses it. “Don’t you worry, honey, it’s just your belt buckle.” I am not wearing a belt. Juicy Fruit, however, is wrapped in foil.’
This is a LibraryThing Early Reviewers snag. The last few months I have only selected books from the Early Reviewers list that I really wanted to read, which has only been about 4 or 5 each month. I’ve been snagging a book on an average of about one every other month. Often enough for the reading schedule during the school year to read my usual books plus the books I need to review.
I selected Crews’ book because she grew up in Texas and because her parents were deaf. I’m always interested in learning more about Deaf culture, and the view from CODA (children of deaf adults) was new to me.
About halfway through the book I had to ask myself why I read so many memoirs by women. I guess the first answer is simply because there are so many of them. I have at least 10 or more on my “to read” shelf waiting for me to get around to them. But still, there are hundreds of books in any particular genre that I don’t read, so why memoirs?
One reason might be that we are looking for someone with a familiar background. Crews satisfied that need for me. Although she is 13 years younger than I am, her formative years were very similar to mine – living in meager circumstances in a family with little communication of consequence. She also lived a somewhat sheltered life, as I did, spending most of her time with her family and with few, if any, close friends. She spent her time reading, playing games with her family, playing basketball and running around the countryside where they lived. She and I were both isolated from our parents, but for different reasons. In her case it was the hearing issue. It did no do good to cry or call out in the night if you were scared, because no one would hear you and come comfort you.
There have been several memoirs that I have read for the literary value. For example, Jill Ker Conway’s writing is superb, so in addition to wanting to learn about growing up in Australia and the struggle for women in academia in North America, I read two of Conway’s books simply for the beauty of the prose. The same is true for Janet Frame and Maya Angelou. Or possibly I need a dose of humor. Haven Kimmel’s writing is both poignant and laugh-out-loud funny, as was Carol Burnett’s memoir. At first, I found Crews’ writing humorous in a surprising way, and I read passages out loud to he-who-caters-to-my-every-whim. The writing is clear, simple and well-paced, but I found it to be a little uneven. The surprising humor gave way to a matter-of-fact telling of growing up uncertain of where they would be living the next year. Violence enters their family life, and Crews conveys her fear well, but again I felt that the writing had changed.
We also read memoirs because of the writer’s experiences. As I said I was most interested in a child’s view of the Deaf community. I learned some things I hadn’t known before, like the fact that deaf people can be loud neighbors because they don’t realize they are making noise. Crews also tells of the discrimination her parents experienced, which persists even after the American’s with Disabilities Act of 1990. While I had read many memoirs that described violent childhoods, I think Crews’ experience reflects what happens to many families when the violence is hidden or when it is connected to psychological problems. Of value in this book is Crews description of what happens if we don’t recognize the trauma that victims of violence experience.
Overall, a good book except for some unevenness. Importance issues like education for the deaf and the changes in response to domestic violence are raised. I’m glad I read it, but don’t feel the need to keep the book for a reread.
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